Being Present

In two weeks from Monday I will be leaving Steubenville and most likely never coming back. If you would have asked earlier this week I would have said that I was ready to be home and doing things for myself. But this week has been so eye opening for me. It has always been difficult for me to "be present" and not think about the future...what will happen at the end of the day, or end of the week, or end of the summer. Thanks to a couple of messages from people and some God moments I've realized this week that I can't just look past my final two weeks here. I can't worry about starting to transition back to my "normal" life because that life won't be the same as it was when I left. I'm not the same as when I left.
The past two days I have been being present and what an amazing feeling that is. To just enjoy every minute for what its worth. This summer will never happen again...even if I choose to work for YouthWorks next summer the memories will not be the same. That's just life as harsh as it sometimes sounds. Even though I wake up so tired in the morning and don't always want to start the day, I'm going to be present these final two weeks and not let great moments pass me by.

We run a kids club in the afternoon and I usually like to help out. I always have known that I've wanted to work with kids, and this summer has solidified that even more. Being around these children is the highlight of my day. Somehow they always are able to lift my spirits. They teach me so much. On Monday I helped drive the kids home and a lot of the attitude in the communities really came out. One of the younger ones, a five year old, said that she hated white people and that she wanted all the white people to leave. I asked it she hated me and she said that I was mixed so that I was ok. She clearly has no understanding of race, but has picked up these attitudes from people around her. As she grows up, these stereotypes will probably get even stronger and the racism will persist. It seems so cruel for us to be leaving these children and being so uncertain of what their future holds. But we've planted the seed in them for what it means to love others. 1 Corinthians 3: 6-7 "I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God made it grow. So neither he who plants nor he who waters is anything, but only God, who makes things grow." I hope that we've planted a seed in these children, and i pray to God that he will watch over them.

Its hard to grasp the idea that the majority of the connections and relationships I've made this summer will be no longer when I leave. My life has been pretty consistent, so I'm having a hard time with the idea of leaving people and most likely never seeing them again. My friend Holly said a great thing the other night and reminded us to not start to detach ourselves from people so that it is easier to leave. By doing that we lose out on so much. Leaving will be hard and it will hurt, but that hurt will be so worth it.

I am amazed by how my faith has grown this summer. So many prayers have been answered and God has put situations in my path to help me grown. I have been blessed to work with amazing people who have challenged me, made me laugh, and supported me.

Heating Up

Wow! Temperatures were probably in the 90s this week! We had some groups that worked outside all day even though it was that hot, which is amazing!
another great week, minus a few complications (about 10 people got poison ivy). I really got to know a lot of the kids at the kids club that we run better this week. I was talking to two 7th grade girls about the area they live in, which is predominantly low-income, african american. They knew so much about the gangs in town, talked a lot about racism, and had friends and brothers who were either in jail or shot. It was a really eye-opening experience for me.
this past weekend we had some staff from Monnessen, PA come and visit us and it was nice to be able to show others around our town.
Hard to believe we only have 1 more month here! Time sure has flown by!

Battle of the Big Ten

We just finished our second week of participants and are enjoying a weekend of relaxation. This week brought groups from Michigan, Indiana, ILlinois and Tennesee. Before the trip even began, one of the adult leaders made it known that Michigan was the best team in the Big Ten and little did he know that he had opened quite the can of worms! Numerous comments were made throughout the week about who had the best football team in the big ten (obviously Wisconsin!).

So many amazing things happened this week....
Our kids club really grew and we had about 30 kids each day come and play games and do art projects. There were moments where the teenagers were frustrated because the kids seemed to be "out of control" and disrespectful, but it was such a good lesson in the patience that we need to have with children. By the end of the week they loved the kids!

We also went to some nursing homes and some of the teenagers really found their calling. A couple of the younger middle school girls spent full days with a couple of elderly women and were in tears about leaving them. They got their address and plan on writing them!

Two of the groups worked on a woman's house that was covered in vines and very overgrown. She suffered from a mental disability, but was living an independent and pretty high functioning life, but spent the majority of time in her house. No sunlight was getting to her house because the trees were so overgrown. Her neighbor told us he didn't even know anyone lived in the house. The groups pulled weeds and took all the vines off her house. Now sunlight is able to come in, which is a great thing. At the end of the week we have a community cookout, and she came and spent time with us. That's really what its all about....sure we improved her house, but its so much better to build a relationship with her!

As much as I love to do the actual service, I'm really taking a lot of joy in watching others participate and grow. Before the summer started, I questioned why I was going to work with a mostly white, middle to upper class population and wondered what more they really needed. But I'm learning that a person's happiness or contentment with their life cannot be judged from skin color or social status. Jesus looked at the hearts of people and we should do the same. Its great to see some of the teenagers really find their niche and to begin to grow in faith.

The end of the week is always hard because you've built such close relationships. When the groups first arrive, I always wonder how I'm going to get to know them. But 4 days later, everyone has become kind of like a family no matter what church they are from. While I may stay in touch with some people, that is not the case for the majority. In a lot of cases, these people come as strangers and may leave with me not knowing what the rest of their life will be like. Its a difficult concept to understand.

My faith in God has grown so much stronger this summer. Its an amazing thing to be able to start with God each day and then to be able to intentionally see God working. He has blessed our summer so much already!